What Happens In The Tent
by Duckster's-Rave
Summary: Ryou drags Malik along on a camping trip, but the Egyptian's got more on his mind than campfires and tents... kinda a shame it's not going to go as he planned...


**A.N: ****Yeah, another MalikxRyou one-shot, and this time for two very good reasons; firstly, it's still my current pairing, and secondly, a review that the very awesome consumedbylove gave me on my last one spurred this idea into my head.**

**So this is dedicated to consumed, my Soul Buddy Luis, who was in mind when I wrote **_**Moth to the Flame, **_**(Yeah, I know it sounds cheesy, but do I look like I care? =P) and everyone who reviewed or added it to their lists! You guys all rock, muchly. *Hands out cookies to all***

**Disclaimer: ****Hmmm…who shall I pick to do this one? *Dramatic pose* Oh, I know, Ryou; do the bad thing!**

**Ryou: Uh, what?**

**Malik: *Rolls his eyes* The disclaimer, you fool, do the disclaimer! **

**Bakura: Why does he get to do this one? *Pokes Lantu***

**Lantu: Because he's asleep for the most of it, genius.**

**Ryou: And why am I as-**

**Lantu: *cuts him off with a random flying hug* Have you any idea how damn cute you are when you're asleep?**

**Malik: *Pulls a face at Bakura, who decides to do the disclaimer anyway***

**Bakura: So, obviously, Lantu does not own **_**YuGiOh**_** in any way; because if she did, Ryou would already be dead from all the hug-raping…lucky bastard… *Blinks as Ryou begins to suffocate in the fangirl's hug* Or not…**

**What Happens in the Tent…**

It had all been Yugi's dumb idea, apparently. He was the one who bounded into class one morning, a huge smile plastered on his small face declaring that he'd had the idea that he and his friends would somehow find it 'a fantastic bonding experience' to go on a camping trip in one of the local forests. Joey had immediately burst out laughing at this phrase.

"What's so funny?" Yugi's voice only had held confusion at the blonde's sudden outburst.

Joey took in a breath, still grinning. "Well, you _did _just say a _bondage _experience, right? I mean, I know you kinda look like the type, but-ouch! Jeez, Téa, what was that for?" He rubbed the back of his head, where Téa had hit him.

The brunette just rolled her eyes at their idiot friend. "Yugi said bond_ing_, not bondage. Although, knowing what a pervert you are; you probably wish it was the first one." She glared once more at Joey before smiling around at the group, who at that moment included Yugi, obviously, Téa, Tristan, Ryou and Kaiba, who at that moment was looking very interested by the back of his left hand. "I think it's a great idea! I mean, it'll give us a chance to really got to know each other and be better friends, so if-"

She was rapidly cut off before she could start yet another friendship speech, by Tristan and Joey stating their agreement. Yugi then had turned to Ryou to get his opinion on this idea. Ryou just shrugged at the idea, which the shorter boy had taken as a yes.

At that point, Kaiba had completely and utterly shocked none of them by turning Yugi's offer down, saying that he'd too much work to do with KaibaCorp that weekend.

"Damn," Yugi cursed later, as the small gang was walking out of the gates on their way home and to get ready for the trip that weekend. "I thought he'd say yes."

Joey had just raised a blonde eyebrow at this. "Why? Everyone knows Kaiba's still a major prick, even after everything that happened in the whole Battle City scenario. Why'd you ask him anyways?" He asked, leaning an arm on the short one's head to annoy him.

Yugi just shrugged and shoved Joey's elbow off his multi-coloured hair. "Because we can still fit one more person in the car." Yugi, for whatever obscure reason, had brought a people-carrier for his first car, instead of something a little more normal. He had looked around at his friends, a look of slight worry on his face. "Well, do any of you guys know who else we can invite?"

Which was the reason why Ryou had turned up at Malik's apartment, practically begging him to come with them.

"And why should I?" The Egyptian teen raised an incredulous eyebrow at this, and folded his arms. "I hardly know them, and after everything I did to them, they're not exactly going to enjoy me being there, are they?"

"Yeah, but it's not like they're bosom buddies with _me _either – Yugi only invited me because I was there. And how bad can it be? I mean, we're only going to be camping in the woods for the weekend, and if you get bored you could always push Joey into the nearest river." The white-haired boy shrugged, but his brown eyes still stayed on Malik's, pleading with him. The Egyptian already knew he was going to have a hard time saying no – there wasn't much that Ryou couldn't get people to do when he deployed the Bambi eyes as a last resort.

"So it's a _camping _trip? As in tents, wilderness, campfires sort of trip?"

Ryou nodded. "That's kind of the point of camping, you know; to get away from civilization and that sort of stuff,"

The tanned teen grinned as he realized what that meant. Him and Ryou…in the middle of nowhere…_alone_… He shrugged mentally. Sure, the midget Pharaoh's vessel and his idiot brigade would be there too; but it wouldn't be too hard to lose them, right?

The whitette turned around, looking as if he intended to leave the small apartment. "But if it's really not your thing, I'll just leave you to it, okay?"

"Alright, alright!" Malik threw his arms up in a parody of defeat. "I'll go on one condition,"

Ryou smiled in relief as he turned around, completely oblivious to Malik's intent of molesting him when the chance arose and they were alone together. "Sure, what is it?"

"We have to share a tent."

"Uh, what?"

The blonde shrugged a shoulder. "You're pretty much the only person of your little group who doesn't make me want to throw myself off the nearest building. And I know you must feel the same way, even if they _are _your friends, otherwise you wouldn't be asking me to come with. So, we tent-share, or I'll leave you to them, got it?"

Ryou frowned slightly, still confused by his blonde friend's strange request. "Okay… I'll see you tomorrow then?"

Malik grinned anew. "Definitely." This was gong to be interesting…

***

Malik laughed softly to himself as he saw Téa and Tristan endeavoring to keep her tent in an upright position and failing in a rather comedic fashion. He had a perfect view of their struggle from his and Ryou's tent, and was lying across his sleeping bag surveying the small group that was spread out across the clearing they'd found after several hours of being hopelessly lost. Joey, Tristan and Yugi were sharing a rather unwieldy large tent that looked like it was about to collapse at any second, and Téa's was once again on the brink of breaking itself. He barely suppressed a snigger as the tent once again collapsed upon the unsuspecting Téa, leaving her squealing in a mound of pegs and tent fabric as Tristan and the others ran around like the proverbial headless chicken, trying to figure out what kept it collapsing.

It didn't help that the main peg to keep it upright was now hidden in Malik's sleeping bag…but that couldn't be helped. It was worth facing the patented Wrath of Téa just for this little comedy show, and anyway, it had just been to damn tempting to not do it.

_And speaking of tempting…_He started slightly as he heard Ryou call over to him from his own place by Téa's tent. The Egyptian walked over, the picture of innocence, even as Ryou did his best attempt at glaring at him, which to be fair, was on Ryou's face more of a mildly annoyed pout. The white-haired boy grabbed Malik's arm and hissed in his ear so that the others couldn't catch it.

"I'm guessing you had something to do with Téa's tent, am I right?"

Malik kept the innocent face up, shrugging the arm that wasn't in the other's grip. "Are you sure it wasn't Bakura?" He teased, sticking his tongue out cheekily as a scowl crossed Ryou's face.

"I _know _it wasn't him – he'd admit it to me and then laugh at my attempts to put it back without anyone noticing. So it had to be you, right?"

Malik sighed in defeat. _Damn. _He knew that the other teen had him against a wall – he smirked slightly at that rather intense mental image – _I wish... _And then: _whoa; easy, boy, he doesn't even know about – hey, he's talking again, pay attention dammit! _

"Uh, Malik, are you listening to me?" Instead of scolding, Ryou's voice had changed to a slightly concerned tone. "Are you okay?"_ Yeah, I'm fine; it's just taking all my self control to not leap on you right now and…shut up, brain._ It was at that point that Malik found himself extremely grateful that only the Millennium Rod allowed you to read people's minds, otherwise Ryou would have long let go of him, and most likely run off screaming. _Hey, it's his fault for being too damn attractive for his own go-_ why_ are you not shutting up? Stupid internal voice. Stupid Ryou. Stupid mental-image-causing, brain melting-_

"_Malik!" _Ryou shook the taller's arm gently, snapping him out of his rather lurid musings. "Come on, I just need you to give back that pole so Téa won't steal _our _tent. I'm not exactly loving the idea of sleeping outside in a dark forest."

There was another squawk of displeasure in the aforementioned girl's direction. The tent had once again committed suicide; straight onto the whole group this time, and Malik couldn't hold it in any longer. He burst into loud peals of laughter that shook Ryou's arm that was still gripping him. He had the grace to look slightly mollified at Ryou's look of annoyance.

"Aw, come _on – _it's funny, right? _Right_?" He grinned again as he saw Ryou's mouth twitch in what could be seen as repressed laughter. "Go on, laugh, you know you want to…" At the other's stubbornness to keep silent, Malik suddenly pounced on the other teen, pushing him to the ground and began tickling every bit of bare skin he could reach. "Laugh, dammit!"

As soon as Ryou couldn't hold in his giggles any longer and laughed fully, Malik threw his arms in the air in a victory pose, violet eyes closed in a huge grin and sat straight down on the other's stomach, effectively pinning him down. "You laughed – I win!" He noticed that Ryou had stopped laughing, mostly because he was stopping him from breathing; and from a slight glare from the white-haired boy, moved down so that he was now straddling Ryou's hips instead. _Uh, okay…this could go two ways right now…_

"You okay down there?" He asked, noticing that Ryou's face was flushed from laughter…and was there something else other than mirth in his eyes?

Ryou finally remembered how to breathe, and gasped out, "Yeah, I'm fine, but you could stand to lose a little weight – for a skinny guy you're surprisingly heavy."

Malik huffed in mock-seriousness. "You calling me fat?"

Ryou was still brushing crimson. "No. Just heavy – and do you mind getting off me?" At this, Malik merely grinned again, and leaned forwards, hands either side of the other's face, so that his and Ryou's faces were only millimeters apart.

"_Make me_." Malik's voice was low, a challenge in more ways than one. _If he does nothing, then that technically means he doesn't _want _me to move, and if he does, than he probably doesn't realize what I actually mean so I've not lost anything, right...? _His stomach clenched slightly as Ryou did nothing for the next several seconds, heart leaping up in hope at the same instant. _Yes! _Malik leaned in to kiss the still-unresisting Ryou, and then both teens jumped slightly at the sound of a cheer going up from the other tents as the group managed to finally keep it upright for more than a millisecond.

And what could, and probably would have been a very intense moment suddenly dissipated into nothing as Ryou shoved the other boy off him and smiled at the happy gang – a little _too _widely.

"Hey, you guys did it! See, Téa; we weren't so useless after all!" Ryou all but skipped across to his friends, leaving the Egyptian teen scowling slightly on the grass. _Damn. _He thought suddenly, eyes absent-mindedly following Ryou's ass. _This is gonna be harder than I thought. _He shook his head in annoyance, and went over to join the group, still trying to figure out what to do now. _Well, there's always tonight, right? You never know, something's_ _pretty much _bound_ to happen…_

_I just hope it's the _good _kind of 'something'. As in the kind where we – shut up, brain._ Malik kicked moodily at a pile of fallen leaves, and stared off into the distance, now ignoring the group's questions if he was alright, and putting them off with a shrug of "Yeah, I'm fine". 

***

Everyone had long since retreated into their own tents, the teenagers having been up all night messing about around the fire that Joey had only started by accident and yet acted like he was now some kind of survival genius. Tristan had quickly remedied this by managing to shove the blonde into a nearby puddle of mud, causing the group to take the piss all night.

During the joking and talking, and general random conversations that had been going on, Malik had been more than a little disappointed to find that Ryou had resolutely kept a safe distance from him at all times. _Aw, what am I going to do? _He'd wondered idly, staring at the constantly-moving shadows formed on the other's face by the fire. _Jump on you again? Well, maybe. But only if you asked me. _He'd hid a smirk behind his hand before anyone was able to ask what the joke was.

Now he was sitting outside his own tent, staring into the half-full moon as Ryou got ready to bed down for the night. He'd practically thrown the Egyptian out of the tent before changing, as if he was scared that Malik would try to rape him. _Like I said earlier, only if you asked. And it's not like you were saying no earlier. _He sighed, a slight fog coming out of his mouth with the biting cold of the night air.

He threw a slightly nervous glance around the clearing. Even with the silver of the overhead moon and stars, it was still pretty dark and shadows pooled around the bases of the tents. He shivered, less from the cold than the fact that he was kind of afraid of the dark. Spending the first ten years of your life underground in what was practically a tomb could do that to a person. Not that he'd admit that to anyone, of course. He was suddenly startled by a white-topped head popping out from the tent's opening and gazing at him.

"You can come back in now." Ryou barely suppressed a smile at Malik as he shivered violently.

"You made me stay out in the cold on purpose, didn't you?" he pouted, and Ryou couldn't hide a giggle.

"'Course I did! It was funny watching you complaining under your breath for the whole time."

"Seems like a certain Thief King's rubbing off on you…" Malik grumbled, pushing past the now-grinning whitette to get inside the tent's warmth.

"What do you mean?" Ryou had now curled up in his own sleeping bag and was staring at Malik with curiosity.

"You wouldn't remember, would you?" Malik shook his head as he brought back the memories of Battle City. "One of the favorite pastimes of your other half," He nodded at the Millennium Ring that Ryou constantly wore. "Was to annoy me. Constantly. Especially with that duel between him and," His smile dropped, and Malik glanced away, wincing slightly at the thought. "The other me."

"Oh." Ryou didn't know what to say to the change in atmosphere. After all, what _could _he say? Instead of pursuing the subject further, he cast around quickly for another subject. He noticed Malik shiver again. "You cold?"

The tanned teen pulled his sleeping bag higher about himself as he shivered again. "Yes, I'm _fucking _cold, Mr Let's-make-Malik-wait-outside-for-several-hours-so-he-catches-friking-pneumonia!" Ryou blinked. Malik was obviously not a happy camper now, to use a cliché.

"Well, we could always zip the sleeping bags together, then we'd both be warm, I guess." This time it was Malik's turn to blink at the other boy.

"Really?" Ryou nodded his head noncommittally.

"Don't see a problem."

_Guess he's gotten over his whole Malik's-going-to-molest-me phobia. Either that, or he's too tired to care much. _

The two had lain there for a while in their now joined sleeping bag, Malik noticing that the whitette had pretty much fallen asleep with so much as a 'goodnight'. He nearly snorted in disdain, before realizing that this was the perfect opportunity to be close to him without anything happening. He smiled at this thought and carefully slid his cold arms around the other's waist to pull him closer. His breath hitched slightly, tensing as Ryou shifted slightly in his arms to face him. _Oh, crap, he's awake. _Malik bit his lip nervously as he searched for an excuse as to what he was doing. He'd opened his mouth to say something, then shut it quickly as he noticed that the whitette was still out of it. _That could have been severely awkward…_ he thought, before pulling his arms tighter around Ryou's back. He shuddered slightly as the cold of the Millennium Ring brushed his bare chest, and Malik wondered how Ryou could stand wearing the thing all the time.

He'd finally stopped shivering, and Malik was about to fall asleep himself with his arms around the shorter boy, when he was jerked out of his doze by something very hard, very sharp and most likely painful suddenly poking into his lower stomach. He froze, and looked at Ryou, who was now glaring at him with blood-red irises.

_Oh, fuck._

Malik saw Bakura's eyes stare straight into his own, and as he opened his mouth to say something, Malik realized that he was in too much shock to say anything. Bakura, however filled this rather uncomfortable silence with a hiss.

"Tomb Keeper," He growled, pushing the blade slightly further so that it was beginning to get painful for Malik, "If you move those hands even a _millimeter _closer to my Hikari's pants, this knife will not hesitate to meet the other side of this sleeping bag via route of your genetailia; got it?"

Malik whimpered slightly at the threat; then swallowed enough to be able to say, "But I'm not – oh." He grinned sheepishly as he noticed that one of his hands was indeed brushing the waistband of Ryou's pajama trousers. "In my defence, I had no idea that – okay, okay! I'm shifting!" The Egyptian quickly moved as far away from the spirit as he could before Bakura decided to change his mind and attempted to castrate him now. He sighed again as Bakura turned over, having hidden the knife again on his person, and whispered a smug 'Goodnight' Malik's way.

Malik just stared pouting at the roof of the tent and tried to fall asleep. _I _knew_ there was a reason I hated camping…_

***.*.End.*.***

**A.N. ****Aw, poor Malik****he never gets what he wants, does he? Not if Bakura has anything to do with it anyway XD **

**As with my other oneshots, this was extremely fun to write, and almost a disappointment to end, but I hope you guys liked it anyway! **

**Loved it? Then review and tell me what you thought. Hated it? Ditto. Followed the wrong link to some other fanfic and found this instead and have no idea what I'm on about? Tell me that too – I just want to see what anyone thinks of this, good or bad!**

**Peace, love and cookies to all!**

**Lantu out =p**


End file.
